The Eternal Battle
This was sent to me via email from my mom on February 4, 2002.
The Eternal Battle. . .
And God populated the earth with broccoli and
cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow vegetables
of all kinds, so man and woman would live long and
And Satan created McDonald's. And McDonald's
brought forth the 99-cent double-cheeseburger. And
Satan said to man, "You want fries with that?" And
man said, "Super size them." And man gained pounds.
And God created the healthful yogurt, that woman
might keep her figure that man found so fair.
And Satan froze the yogurt, and he brought forth
chocolate, nuts and brightly colored sprinkle candy
to put on the yogurt. And woman gained pounds.
And God said, "Try my crispy fresh salad."
And Satan brought forth creamy dressings, bacon
bits, and shredded cheese. And there was ice cream
for dessert. And woman gained pounds.
And God said, "I have sent your heart healthy
vegetables and olive oil with which to cook them."
And Satan brought forth chicken-fried steak so big
it needed its own platter. And man gained pounds,
and his bad cholesterol went through the roof.
And God brought forth running shoes, and man
resolved to lose those extra pounds.
And Satan brought forth cable TV with remote control
so man would not have to toil to change channels
between ESPN and EPSN2. And man gained pounds.
And God said, "You're running up the score, Devil."
And God brought forth the potato, a vegetable
naturally low in fat and brimming with nutrition.
And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced
the starchy center into chips and deep-fat fried
them. And he created sour cream dip also. And man
clutched his remote control and ate the potato chips
swaddled in cholesterol. And Satan saw and said,
"It is good." And man went into cardiac arrest.
And God sighed and created quadruple bypass
And Satan created HMOs...
Last Updated: 021702